Dmsentz's Blog

Is there someone out there who can fix my broken pieces??

dmsentz — Wed, 14 Oct 2009 10:15:46 +0000

I know that you cannot live your life through someone else. I have never in my life done that, but it hurts to know that there is no one who is willing to stand by my side throughout life. I know I have my family and friends. But I am talking about someone I love. I do not want too much out of life, other than being successful and happy but one big thing that I want and have yet to get is the man I love stay with me for more than just a few months. I want something that is going to last. I am not saying hey- let’s get hitched tomorrow. I just want someone there to hold me and cuddle with me and love me for who I am and learn not to hate me because I have faults. But I am not going to go out tonight and start hooking-up with random guys. That is tacky and does not help a broken heart.

I bet a lot of people expect me to say horrible things about all of my exes, especially the ones who hurt me very deeply, but I am not going to. I may call you a cynical asshole- but that is only to Jess when she is trying to make me laugh through tears. But I am not going to sit down and bad mouth any of you, and I want the same in return. It would be nice to be able to talk to all of my exes and be friends with them, but I know that is not possible with almost all of them. But there is one who is willing, and I hope you read this knowing that I want the same. If not, well, that is fine. I will just have to learn to deal with things in the new reality that I am too difficult and too demanding. Nothing new really, I have been told that so many times; I am starting to really hate reruns.

But it is hard to not know what someone is after. If I tried to changed everything, it would not be the same, just another disaster. I am waiting and search for some kind of miracle. But I am just another beautiful disaster holding on through the tears and the laughter, hurting, and wishing for someone to pick up the broken pieces.

Is there really such a thing out there?

Let it go….

dmsentz — Tue, 13 Oct 2009 16:34:09 +0000

There are people who can walk away from you.

And hear me when I tell you this! When people can walk away from you: let them walk.
I don’t want you to try to talk another person into staying with you, loving you, calling you, caring about you, coming to see you, staying attached to you. I mean hang up the phone.

When people can walk away from you let them walk. Your destiny is never tied to anybody that left.

The Bible said that, they came out from us that it might be made manifest that they were not for us. For had they been of us, no doubt they would have continued with us. [1 John 2:19]

People leave you because they are not joined to you. And if they are not joined to you, you can’t make them stay. Let them go.

And it doesn’t mean that they are a bad person it just means that their part in the story is over And you’ve got to know when people’s part in your story is over so that you don’t keep trying to raise the dead. You’ve got to know when it’s dead. You’ve got to know when it’s over. Let me tell you something. I’ve got the gift of good-bye. It’s the tenth spiritual gift, I believe in good-bye. It’s not that I’m hateful, it’s that I’m faithful, and I know whatever God means for me to have He’ll give it to me. And if it takes too much sweat I don’t need it. Stop begging people to stay. Let them go!!

If you are holding on to something that doesn’t belong to you and was never intended for your life, then you need to…… LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to past hurts and pains …… LET IT GO!!!

If someone can’t treat you right, love you back, and see your worth….. LET IT GO!!!
If someone has angered you …….. LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to some thoughts of evil and revenge…… LET IT GO!!!

If you are involved in a wrong relationship or addiction….. LET IT GO!!!

If you are holding on to a job that no longer meets your needs or talents…… LET IT GO!!!

If you have a bad attitude……. LET IT GO!!!

If you keep judging others to make yourself feel better…… LET IT GO!!!

If you’re stuck in the past and God is trying to take you to a new level in Him…… LET IT GO!!!

If you are struggling with the healing of a broken relationship…….. LET IT GO!!!

If you keep trying to help someone who won’t even try to help themselves….. LET IT GO!!!

If you’re feeling depressed and stressed ……… LET IT GO!!!

If there is a particular situation that you are so used to handling yourself and God is saying “take your hands off of it,” then you need to…… LET IT GO!!!

Let the past be the past. Forget the former things. LET IT GO!!!

Get Right or Get Left .. think about it, and then…… LET IT GO!!! “The Battle is the Lord’s!”

I will always….

dmsentz — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 23:18:12 +0000

Good morning, on July 7

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved, now and then joyfully, then sadly, waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us – I can live only wholly with you or not at all – Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you, and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits – Yes, unhappily it must be so – You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you. No one else can ever possess my heart – never – never – Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves. And yet my life in V is now a wretched life – Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men – At my age I need a steady, quiet life – can that be so in our connection? My angel, I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day – therefore I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once – Be calm, only by a calm consideration of our existence can we achieve our purpose to live together – Be calm – love me – today – yesterday – what tearful longings for you – you – you – my life – my all – farewell. Oh continue to love me – never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.

ever thine
ever mine
ever ours

I am no one great

dmsentz — Mon, 12 Oct 2009 20:28:21 +0000

I am no one special. I am not a great philosopher. I have never saved a life. I have never taken a life. I have not traveled the world. I have not even seen the majority of this country. I have never been on a motorcycle. I have never been arrested. I have never been on a cruise. I have never been to Myrtle Beach….

There are so many I have nevers in my life. But here is what I have done.

I have laughed. I have loved. I have hated. I have succeeded. I have accomplished goals. I have sweat. I have played on a team. I have taken some risks. I have cried. I have yelled. I have cursed. I have gone to school. I have worked for days on end. I have done what I want to do…

I am no one great. But I am someone. I may not be famous. I may not be a size 2. I may not have kids. I may not have a husband. But I have friends and family who care about me. They care about my well-being. I am someone who is capable of greatness. And I am tired of people trying to hold me back by purposely bringing me down because they have no drive in life. They are not accomplished. They have not succeeded. They are unhappy. I am tired of people thinking they have won when only this race has just began. It is go time…. So get ready…

I was told that Oprah wrote this about men

dmsentz — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 22:22:43 +0000

Oprah wrote this about men…
If a man wants you, nothing can keep him away. If he doesn’t want you, nothing can make him stay. Stop making excuses for a man and his behavior. Allow your intuition (or spirit) to save you from heartache.
Stop trying to change yourself for a relationship that’s not meant to be. Slower is better. Never live your life for a man before you find what makes you truly happy. If a relationship ends because the man was not treating you as you deserve then heck no, you can’t “be friends”. A friend wouldn’t mistreat a friend.
Don’t settle. If you feel like he is stringing you along, then he probably is.
Don’t stay because you think “it will get better.” You’ll be mad at yourself a year later for staying when things are not better. The only person you can control in a relationship is you.
Avoid men who’ve got a bunch of children by a bunch of different women. He didn’t marry them when he got them pregnant, why would he treat you any differently?
Always have your own set of friends separate from his. Maintain boundaries in how a guy treats you. If something bothers you, speak up.
Never let a man know everything. He will use it against you later.
You cannot change a man’s behavior. Change comes from within. Don’t EVER make him feel he is more important than you are…even if he has more education or in a better job.
Do not make him into a quasi-god. He is a man, nothing more nothing less.
Never let a man define who you are. Never borrow someone else’s man. If he cheated with her, he’ll cheat on you. A man will only treat you the way you ALLOW him to treat you.
All men are NOT dogs. You should not be the one doing all the ending…compromise is a two way street

I am not looking for a happy ending, I am looking for a beautiful beginning

dmsentz — Sun, 11 Oct 2009 20:18:14 +0000

Who knew life would not turn into the fairy tale we all dreamed it would. There is no reason to sit and wait on the fairy tale ending. Why wish that something would end happily when it is all just beginning? I want a beautiful beginning of something wonderful rather than a rocky start to tragedy. Things are hard enough as it is rather than making it any harder learn to love and leave then stay and die.

Things are never what they seem. But cherishing the little moments that made you happiest makes things a lot easier to get over then trying to hold on to the big things that are impossible to grasp. It is better to have loved and lost then have never loved at all. Yet the greatest happiness in the world is to love and be loved. It is so contradicting that it makes me dizzy to try to figure out.

If someone had told me three years ago that I would be where I am right now I probably would have hit them. But the only one to blame for the mistakes and all nighters of crying and stressing is myself. One of my biggest problems is that I wear my heart on my sleeve and I let things affect my emotions more then anyone I know. But hey, that is me. Take it or leave it.

But you have to be careful with something so fragile. Much like a butterfly: if you hold it too tightly you will crush its body and spirit. But if you hold it too loosely it will fly away forever.